Www.Here-I-Am

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OUR VISION

UK Version. US Version. The Mindfulness Project is a London-based organisation dedicated to teaching and spreading mindfulness in the UK and beyond. We have a beautiful centre in Central London and an online platform where we offer evidence-based programmes for learning and practicing mindfulness. We, Alexandra Frey and Autumn Totton , co-founded the project and co-authored this book. All of us at The Mindfulness Project are deeply motivated by the way the practice has changed and enriched our own lives and by the huge evidence base that shows it has the potential to do the same for many others.

We are excited to be sharing mindfulness in this unique and creative way with I am here now. To learn more and continue building the essential skills of mindfulness, join one of our live web-based programmes from anywhere or visit our centre in London. And I am prepared and ready to do it, because I recognize, although it is hard, it is also important that I act. We hear this word when we are loved, and we say it when we love. When it is absent, we are miserable. When it is said insincerely, we feel betrayed. When they put themselves aside to be entirely available to you?

We know when we are speaking to someone whose attention is not entirely on us when we hear the clicking of the keys in the background or see their eyes focused elsewhere.


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All of us can detect the nuances that accompany this word — echoes of falsehood or distraction as well as tones of truth and sincerity. He says it to God, to Isaac and to an angel. Each call and each response is so different. One comes out of awe, another out of love and yet another from pain. At this point in his life, Abraham is in a good place. Both Sarah and Hagar have given him sons: Ishmael and Isaac. Abraham is affluent. He has flocks and tents and servants. And Abraham responded Hineni — Here I am. I wondered why he was so able to say Hineni. I realize that the relationship between Abraham and God goes back many years; it is based on a covenant, a spiritual partnership that was established back in Haran.

But this year I noted that when God calls out urgently, Abraham stops and turns away from his work and replies Hineni. Here I am! I am ready!

I am focused! And I am listening! While commitment involves being prepared for what we anticipate and hope for, even more importantly, real commitment means being present and responsive to the unplanned and unexpected. Abraham has no idea why God has called him or what God will ask, but he is ready and responsive. Nearly 25 years later, my life is different.

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I still believe in God. But I feel a little estranged. I know that some rabbis would not share their own spiritual stories with their congregation. But I want us to have an honest relationship. I am struggling now.

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But that is how I feel. Maybe you can relate to my own struggles. I think it is part of life. These past several years I have spent much time meditating, davening, trying to know what God, or Judaism, expects from me.

For this Rosh HaShanah, my goal is to embrace the Hineni attitude. To live life with the hope of doing what God expects of me. God called Abraham because God knew Abraham had a sense of obligation or duty. Because Abraham had lived a Hineni life even before God called. And that is what God and Judaism expect of us. But never more powerfully than this moment.

This Hineni comes from a place of love.

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I am not always the one in control. Showing up in our own lives is only a beginning. We learn, at some point in life, that we experience life as meaningful when we connect our lives with others, when we recognize that our struggles and successes are deeply intertwined with theirs. Our spouses, our parents and children, our most loved companions, need to know that when they call us, we will be there to walk alongside them. I will set aside those things occupying my energy right now, the trials of my life, so that I can be with you in yours. Perhaps this Hineni is the most familiar to us.

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We so very much want to be there for our partners as they face challenges at work, our children when they have been hurt, our friends as they struggle with illness. Despite this reality, so many of you at TBE step up to say Hineni. I watch as a middle-aged woman battles cancer and YOU attend to her daily needs. And you do. You bring dinner to a fellow congregant who is in mourning.

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You invite another mother to coffee. You know her child is a challenge and you give this mom a chance to talk about how mothering can be so very, very hard. You go. You do. You make yourself present by offering the best Hineni you can. While over these past 25 years I have felt less secure in the Hineni I offer to God, I have come to understand and feel more attuned to the human Hineni I offer to the people in my life and the members of our community. But I care. Sometimes I will offer a prayer or we will sit in silence.